Bloated, Hairy Shitbags
Well, that happened.
In the last weeks of my relationship with The Ex Girlfriend, she and I went camping with our friends Whitney and Collin to a campground in Eastern Oregon. On the long drive through the Columbia Gorge, we talked about school, movies, TV, music, and just about all the normal, safe, nonpartisan conversation topics.
But then, we started talking politics, and within a few minutes we were yelling at each other.
Whitney and The Ex Girlfriend were of the opinion that all Republicans, everywhere, were irreparably retarded and needed to be wiped off the face of the Earth.
“They’re just so stupid.” The Ex Girlfriend said. “They’re totally evil. I just wish they would all die.”
I tried to point out that wanting everybody who had an opinion different from yours to die was, in many ways, not all that different from the way the Bush Administration had been running the show for eight years.
“Also,” Collin pointed out, “Just because somebody is a fiscal conservative who wants to preserve states’ rights doesn’t mean he’s automatically a Bible thumping racist.”
“All I’m saying is, Republicans aren’t doing anybody any good.” Whitney said. “All they’ve ever done is start wars and destroy the environment.”
“But Richard Nixon started the EPA.” I protested. “Teddy Roosevelt created the National Parks and won a Nobel Peace Prize, for God’s sake!”
“Jesus, Truman, you don’t know what you’re talking about.” The Ex Girlfriend snapped.
Keep in mind, everybody in the car classified him or herself as a liberal. However, Collin was a former Republican with fiscally conservative tendencies, and I know enough intelligent and reasonable Republicans to have some respect for their point of view, even if I don’t share it. But that’s the current state of political discourse in this country, I guess – we’re so divided that a political conversation between liberals and slightly less liberal liberals still degenerates into hysterics just as fast as a 5th grade slumber party where the pizza rolls are full of crystal meth.
My feeling is that an ideology, so long as it’s not one perpetrated on punching babies or disenfranchising minorities, isn’t evil in and of itself. Conservatism, Christianity, Islam, and the pro-life movement are not inherently evil. Fundimentalism is the real evil; the point at which people get so wrapped up in an ideology that they start hurting others. That’s why I make a point of seeking out and acknowledging fellow liberals who are totally full of shit a lot of the time – Michael Moore and Keith Olbermann, come on down!
But when I hear that Senate Republicans have their panties in such a tight wad over healthcare that they’re actually utilizing a Congressional loophole to walk off the job at 2:00 every day, stalling hearings on national security and homelessness to name a few, I can’t help but think that maybe Whitney and The Ex Girlfriend were right.
And if there’s one thing I hate, it’s other people being right, especially when I used to date one of them.
Matt Tiabbi wrote a story for Rolling Stone a couple years ago called “Obama’s Moment.” Written while Obama was still on the campaign trail, the story combines interviews with Obama supporters and the author’s own musings on just what, exactly, makes Obama so different from other politicians, who Tiabbi referred to as “bloated, hairy shitbags.” The article is a difficult read today, because it reminds us liberals of how we assumed that, realistically, Obama would be able to fix, like, maybe three or four things, in stark contrast to today, where the majority of Republican senators would ardently oppose an Obama-approved anti puppy torture bill.
I just can’t understand where the support for these tactics is coming from anymore. A while back I wrote an update about how liberals were trying just as hard to stall the Bush Administration’s progress a few years ago, but I have no recollection of them straight up not doing their jobs as revenge.*
*Of course, that depends on your definition of ‘not doing their jobs’, because for eight years there it was like half of Congress was just sleeping while wearing those novelty glasses with pictures of open eyes on them.
I’ve got Republican readers – and hello to you all – and I have to ask: Are you proud of this? I’m not blaming you for these actions and I certainly don’t think it’s your fault, I’m just genuinely curious. I just want to know if you see Republicans walking out on the jobs that you and me and everybody pays them to do and feel the same sort of “Go get ‘em!” thrill I felt when that Iraqi reporter threw his shoes at Bush.
I’m serious – either hit me up on Facebook or leave a comment below. I’m not trying to pick a fight, I just want to know how it makes you feel. I want to know where you’re coming from. If you support them, I want to know why you feel like it’s an okay thing for them to do. I don’t want to vilify you; I’d much rather understand you.
All I’m saying is, don’t laugh at President Obama’s failure to enact ‘change’ when this sort of thing happens. It’s not exactly his fault.
Truman Capps will give you all the details on London next week, barring any further shutdown of government.